Bohemian Rhapsodizing: MadHatter's First Sleepover

When she was about 4, MadHatter asked me when she would be able to have a sleepover. I explained that had already been to lots of sleepovers in her years - she slept over at Nana and Grampa's house each time we visited; she slept at her friend A's house when we stayed with them at Christmas; she had been to various of our friends houses when we were on vacation. She thought about that and then responded with a look that said I was crazy and said that she meant she wanted to have a real sleepover, one that did not involve me. Oh, you mean like a slumber party type sleepover I asked. A little sleepy head nodded yes, yes, yes. And I just pulled a number out of my head that sounded good - nine. When she turned nine she could have her first sleepover without me. And that was fine with her. Until about 6 months ago.

At the end of the last school year, a group of her friends started having sleep overs. Nothing with a large number of kids, usually just one girl staying at another's house. And many times it was brought about by necessity: the parents need to travel to their home country to renew Visas, but the child still has school; a family emergency back home means leaving in a hurry and due to distance and the fact that many of the working parents travel, friends are relied on to care for the young kids; needing both parents to travel for a work function. I know, #expatproblems but they started the almost daily question, now from both of my girls, who are still only 6 and 7 1/2, when they can have sleepovers too. And I have stuck to my once seemingly random age of nine. Because I find that there is still no need for them to be spending the night at a friends house when their bedtimes are still before 8 pm.

And then MadHatter joined Brownies. I love that her school offers the 2nd and 3rd graders the chance to participate in Girl Scouts as Brownies. I did it when I was little and in this crazy expat world we have chosen to live in, my girls will at least get to experience some of the things that are such an integral part of my childhood memories. I also love that MadHatters teacher is the one that runs the program. Because it made it much easier to send MadHatter off to her very first sleepover last week. Yep, I did it. And all before she even turned 8. So much for my timeline.

MadHatter had been looking forward to this sleepover since it was announced at her very first Brownie meeting in early September. The girls would be staying at the school, in the little gym. They would be taking a hike, doing some sewing, playing games. They would cook their own dinner in the cafeteria, and then make their own breakfasts in the morning. They would sleep on mats, in sleeping bags and they would tell stories and take pictures and bond. The hope was that they would build the start of friendships that would last a lifetime. Writing that down, I can see why she was so excited. I was too, because I was going to come as a chaperon. And then I found out that B did not come home from his trip until Saturday morning. I didn't think it wise to let Stinkerbell stay home alone, so I was out. Sadly.

I packed her bags for her according to the list sent home. And then I dropped them off at school. I gave her an extra tight hug and a kiss and sent her off with her friends. I don't even think she noticed I was gone. But, as Stinkerbell and I headed home alone, I already noticed she was.

Stinkerbell and I had a great time, just the two of us. We had snacks chosen by Stinkerbell, played games chosen by Stinkerbell, a dinner and movie chosen by....Stinkberbell. It was all about Stinkerbell, something that doesn't happen often enough for her liking. And we had a great time together. But we both noticed something was missing. As she was brushing her teeth that night Stinkerbell stated, "It just wasn't the same without MadHatter". I agree kiddo, I agree. Because as much as I have been on trips away from the girls, I have never been in my house without one of them for the night. And that is no small difference. Because having her sleeping away means that she is truly growing up. It means that she is taking her first steps away from home. Sure, its a small step but it is the one that begins her leaving home. First it is sleepovers, then it is a week away with the middle school kids, then it's sports competitions in other countries, and then she is moving out to go to college. I know, I am getting way ahead of myself but it's true. It only takes that first step to send her on the path to independence and moving out...Chalk it up to another milestone reached.

She has been home a week now and she can't stop talking about the fun they had, and she keeps singing the songs they learned and the hand clapping rhymes she has mastered. She can't wait to do it again in the Spring. I sent her with a camera (of course I did, because I couldn't be there to document it) and was so excited to see her pictures. But I guess she was too busy having fun to take too many, because the ones below are all that were on her camera (I have left them untouched and unedited). Enjoy a small peek into what an 8-9 year old sleep over looks like...